And we’ll become silhouettes when our bodies finally go

I’ve been meaning to write (this time I swear), but I’ve been in such a weird place/mental funk, that I’ve been trying to avoid the blog altogether. I know that doesn’t really help me or the blog at all, but fortunately my schedule has been equally insane, so I haven’t had as much time to dwell in my murky mood, at least not on the internets.

The long and the short of it is I think I’m going through some growing pains and I need to learn what will and won’t make me happy and I need to keep my sensitivity/emotions in check while I do that. Easier than said, sure, but it’s doable. I just need to do it.

The bright side is that there’s been some pretty positive stuff going on. The rescue had the opportunity to meet with the Vice President of Petco (like, the entire company, not just the regional VP) during a summit held by the PSPCA and we were able to get face time with him and talk about getting our rabbits into the local stores. And… he said he will make it happen. Granted, I have to make the grant app happen to get the ball officially rolling, but this is a really huge step for our rescue and efforts: we now will be able to take in more rabbits and be able to house them in a central location. This is a really huge, exciting step in the right direction for us.

This positive push has really helped boost my motivation and so I’ve been putting in a lot of extra time trying to work on some of FBS’s other projects/get our social networking stuff up to par/find more partnerships with other organizations. We’re in the process of overhauling our logo/website, and once again, I have to give a major shout out to Kate of www.chocolatecakeandbeer.com fame for all her tremendous and selfless work. Not only did she create our website, but now she’s helping us rehaul it. And she hasn’t asked for a dime. That’s pretty damn amazing and selfless and I am forever grateful to her and her talents.

These advancements have given me the motivation and inspiration to see how I can cultivate some of my skill sets in different venues in order to gain experience and knowledge and maybe at some point, open the door to new possibilities for myself. I’ve spent far too long waiting for some awesome opportunity to be dropped in my lap and trying to make magic happen in places where I know it won’t happen. Now that I’ve recognized that, I need to focus that energy and my resources on the things/people that will enable positive growth in my life.

I’m definitely going to have to work on pacing myself, though, but there are so many things I need to work on and my time just feels so damn limited. I literally came home after work last night, sat down, and worked on the various things on my to-do list until close to 3 a.m. It’s been a pretty similar story tonight, although there is no way I’m staying up that late again (although it is already almost midnight and there’s at least 2-3 more things I need to do before bed).

But still, I prefer to be productive than to sit idle. I feel like I’m finally able to gain some of the much-needed direction I’ve been lacking in order to jump start the various projects I keep saying I will get around to…

On that subject, I finally started to make some headway with figuring out how to re-launch my online mag dream, so that is also exciting. Now I just need to figure out what my exact focus will be with it.

Although I’d love to just replicate Lucy (in terms of content), I just don’t know if that’s the right direction. I’ll have to take a better look at my resources (financial, time, and contributor-wise) and see where my interests and those of potential contributors lie and see if any of my old connections still exist. My ongoing leaning has been a general interest magazine with the standard book/movie/music reviews and feature articles, along with some awesome illustration/art design/photos. Anyone out there interested in writing for an online mag like this?

So I guess when you look at it, things are going pretty well. Now all I need is to get my brain/humors on board and life will be gravy.