I feel unique, not yet complete…

So, I have this blog I’ve been working on now for a couple of months and it’s just not panning out the way I want it to. I think it’s good, interesting content, but it’s just not writing the way I want it to–I have plenty written and it seems cohesive enough, but there’s something very much missing… not enough connective tissue, not enough soul… not enough something. 

I logged on this morning to just say something, anything, because I haven’t posted in a bit, and I saw that blog sitting there. I spent another 45 minutes working on it, thinking maybe since more time had passed, it would be easier to shape it up and get it where it needs to be.

It wasn’t.

I can’t tell you how many of these half-melded blogs I have taunting me from my “drafts” folder, some that eventually become something and some that I virtually forget about altogether until I eventually I go through all these half-finished musings, trying to see if any of them are salvageable.

I guess this is a part of the process–there are some ideas/thoughts that can be expressed so effortlessly, and there are some that take so much time, thought, writing, and rewriting before they see the light of day. I wonder sometimes how obvious it is to the reader–can you tell when I’ve particularly struggled with a posting, when I’ve gone through multiple rewrites or drafts? Oddly, I always find that these are the ones that feel a bit “flatter,” but that could also be because I feel flattened by them–they definitely put me through the ringer before allowing me to write them.

I don’t know how terribly interesting this is to read about, but I was just looking at the many half-baked ideas and epiphanies, patiently waiting their turn to be completed, and it makes me realize a) how often I actually do try to produce meaningful content, b) how little of what I actually try to create ends up meeting your eyes. It kind of made me appreciate the process a bit more and I thought you all would be happy to know that when I go dormant, it’s not because I’m not writing, as much as it’s I’m not writing things terribly worth reading. See, reader? I’ve got your back, after all…

Anyone out there have a similar issue with their creative stuffs? Any suggestions for how to work through it to salvage whatever it is you’re trying to create?

Heard this band in a café when I was out in San Fran. Been especially smitten with this track..